Time is My lover

Enveloping me in arms which stand her test

She whispers in rhythmic beats

that this too will pass and is passing

That in the face of newly impending pasts

She will carry me through

And in the battles which by my birth I

must fight

She will find in my past strength to persevere

A companion of my lineage

She was the quickness of permanent escape to freedom

Or the lengthiness of the equally deathful wait

She couldn't move fast enough

Too slow for many to live

But worked diligently to keep them alive

She let them marinate,

meat in a slow cooker

Raped, pounded, seasoned,

baked

Bones strung like trophies between white teeth

And then she saved us

Oh in the nick of time

Patched them up and threw kerosene on wounds

to fuel the fire driving us forward

Planted in them the insecurities which would inhabit

and inhibit every decision they made and did not make

Time glued them to seats

That weren't meant for them

And held them there against all forces pushing them to do otherwise

Each tick of her pulse bringing them one second closer to the absurdity

that lies on the edge of suicide.

I am like them, I am their love child with Time

a new generation asks old questions

Tied by her

to seats that aren't meant for them

Forget Am I beautiful?

Is this body even mine?

Hands grab at me

like this flesh and these bones belong on their plate

And dreams seem as though they are a privilege

My death is one late night walk away

While peers chuck life around like they do pigskins

and I wonder if the only role I'll ever play is martyr

The words that I speak

are they mine?

or will I always feel they belong to somebody else

or something else

Somewhere, some time other than the one that loves me?

The one that stands before me

bare and full

Yet whom in darkness, I cannot see in entirety

I feel my way into holes and passageways where I find

pain in what has been lost

Passion in what can be gained

And pleasure in what will come from me

I rest my head on her bosom

Like a mother Time is my sight in a void of darkness

and I am soothed by the hush of her pulse

It is filled with the life of that which has come and gone

And that which is yet to be

She has given me life

And helped to reap its gifts

she tells me that this too will pass and is passing

And a child of Time

I believe her

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Somewhere Here

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Things you must know if ever you are to love me